Holidailies: It Came Upon A Midnight Clear

"It came upon the midnight clear, That glorious song of old, From angels bending near the earth, To touch their harps of gold;"

There is a heaviness in my heart tonight. It is a bit better than I felt yesterday and certainly not as terrible as I felt on Sunday night when I first got the news that my friend, my ladybug Angel of God, had lost her father. There was no warning, no explanations. He simply didnt wake up. It is a tough thing to look for bright things in times of dark sorrow, but for my friend's sake, I will try to embrace the things that she is glad about.

He went in his sleep and I imagine that when people die in thier sleep there is as little trauma as you might have in death. It is tough to think that sudden and unexpected circumstances might snatch anyone you know, anyone you love, even your own self, in any moment but if i had to choose how I might go, I would want it to be thus: without pain, without trauma, without desperateness.

"I love you" were among the last words that she spoke to him. There are a million platitudes about living each day as though it were your last, and making sure you dont go to bed angry and on and on. But we are human, fallible and coarse. On any given day we leave friends in huffs and relatives without a word of goodbye. We say things we regret later and think things that we really dont mean to come true. I am glad that she doesnt have words to haunt her final moments with her father.

There are things that I wish I could do to ease the pain in her heart and I send a prayer up to whomever will listen that she and her fmaily find peace and comfort. It may not be much that i can offer but it makes me feel a little less helpless and alone in the stillness of the night.

There is a glass bell on my Christmas tree and without warning, my cat pats the tree and I hear the little musical chime, the soft tinkle of the bell, the sound of another angel getting its wings.

"The world in solemn stillness lay, To hear the angels sing."